Grumpy Old Men

America’s past two Presidents were the oldest in history. President Joe Biden will turn 80 in November. As the New York Times recently pointed out, Mr. Biden is the oldest serving U.S. President at age 79. He will be 82 when he finishes his first term. If Donald Trump chooses to run in 2024, he will be 78 years old.

For gosh sakes, don’t these guys have any grandkids to play with?

Yes, my friends, we are only a mere 867 days away from the next Presidential slugfest. That means we are about 15 minutes away from the first campaign ads for the Red and Blue teams hitting our television screens. It’s yet another reason to watch Netflix instead of cable.

The nation’s political pundits are already starting to handicap the race. The word “handicap” is appropriate. Let me explain.

It appears that former President Donald J. Trump is preparing his Presidential re-election announcement. It’s not a matter of “if” he will run, It’s a matter of “when” he will announce; either before or after the mid-terms. President Joe Biden has already announced his intention to run for re-election. Game on, I guess.

I mean no disrespect to either of these men. We should be grateful for their willingness to serve, even if you hate one of them, which you undoubtedly do. But, so far, Father Time is undefeated on this earth and both of these candidates are deep into the extra innings of life. Is eating a fried Snickers on a stick at the Iowa State Fair or having pancakes at a diner in New Hampshire really what they envisioned for their last few years on earth?

To put the ages of these men in perspective the movie Casablanca was released the same year President Biden was born. And, It’s a Wonderful Life was released the same year former President Trump was born. These great movies were filmed before the advent of color film. I mean no dis-respect to my more seasoned readers, but these are two grumpy, old men. In comparison, President John F. Kennedy, Jr. was 43 at his inauguration. He wasn’t old or grumpy.

The press has been taking note of Biden’s age, of late. To counter the negative ink, some handlers in the White House decided to put the President’s vigor and vitality on full display. They staged a photo opp for the President, riding a bicycle at the beach. It ended badly, as his brand new, fresh-out-of-the-box, royal blue Nike sneaks got caught in the bicycle’s toe cage. Fortunately he wasn’t hurt. It can happen to anyone, but the embarrassing accident focused even more attention on his advancing age. Someone at the White House should be fired for putting the world’s most powerful man on a bicycle.

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Now, before you start sending me hate mail, let’s both agree that Donald Trump is also too old to be riding a bicycle. And, too old for the worlds most stressful job. And, let’s not forget Washington’s grumpiest, grumpy old man, Bernie Sanders. He is also willing to run again. But, Bernie Sanders is older than both Biden and Trump.

Our constitution states that a candidate must reach age 35 in order to run for President. Do you think we should also have a maximum age? I do. If President Biden were to be re-elected he would be 86 at the end of his second term. That’s twice the age of JFK at his inauguration.

Look, I’m 54 years old. I still have a lot of gas left in the tank. But, I wouldn’t take that job if you gave it to me. By any measure it’s the most demanding and stressful job in the world. In comparison, my father was a commercial airline pilot. After 37 years of flawless professional flying he was forced to retire. Apparently the airlines were concerned that, at his advanced age, he could no longer effectively handle the stress and strain of the job. He was 60.

Some might argue that 80 is the new 70. To be sure, people are living longer. But, I’m not so sure that living longer necessarily means that somehow our cognitive decline is delayed. And, I’m not sure it’s wise for two octogenarians to duel over who is gonna get control of the Nuclear codes.

But, it may be a moot point. As Peggy Noonan writes this week in the WSJ, Trump and Biden Both Face Rejection from their parties. Biden for being a nattering, old man and Trump for being, well, Trump.

Mark Leibovich, a writer for The Atlantic magazine, recently opined in an article that Joe Biden was too old to run for re-election. “He will sometimes mangle sentences, blank on names, get tortured by teleprompters, lose his train of thought, or not make sense—which is not so abnormal for someone his age, writes Leibovitz. He is right.

A few weeks ago I wrote an article called Why We Lost Faith in Our Institutions & Each Other. Ironically, in an era where we trust gas-station sushi more than our politicians, we keep nominating and electing the same people, regardless of their advancing age or untoward behavior. For example, Senator Mitch McConnell has been a US Senator since I was in high school. Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer has been in the Senate for 23 years. And, of course, Speaker Nancy Pelosi is older than all these knuckleheads at 82 years old. She’s been in Washington for 33 years.

The winner of the gerontological achievement award is California Senator Dianne Feinstein. The San Francisco Chronicle recently published an article claiming that the 88-year-old Feinstein has become “mentally unfit to serve”. Multiple witnesses recounted that Feinstein often fails to recognize long-time colleagues. She is easily confused during policy discussions. Senator Feinstein is a senior member of the Appropriations Committee where she serves as ranking member on the Subcommittee on Energy and Water Development. Maybe that explains why the western half of the US is running out of water.

On Biden, Leibovitz went on to write:

Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton reappeared a few days ago to give a speech in Washington, DC. It ignited speculation that she may run again in 2024. She’s the youngest of all these characters at a spry 74 years old. She claims that running is “out of the question” but, if that’s true, what’s she doing giving a speech in Washington, DC? Doesn’t she have any grandkids to play with?

Some will undoubtedly argue that there are no viable alternatives to these grumpy old men and women. Really? Out of 300 million US citizens this is the best we can do? You gotta be kidding me. I won’t risk tossing out names, but there are several vibrant (younger) players for the Red and Blue farm teams that could be great leaders-and are probably a lot less grumpy.

All this reminds me of President Ronald Reagan. I remember as a teenager thinking he was old. Really old. Reagan was only 69 at his inauguration. A comparative youngster in this crowd.

In 1984 during the second Presidential debate against Senator Walter Mondale, Reagan was asked about his advancing age. Reagan was ready with the zinger: “I will not make age an issue of this campaign,” he said, barely hiding a smile. “I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent’s youth and inexperience.” Even Mondale (56) chuckled at the line.

Ironically, it was during those 1984 Presidential debates that Reagan first appeared confused in public. He later displayed memory lapses or seemed disoriented. While critics raised questions about his cognitive decline, he wasn’t officially diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease until 1994, more than four years after leaving office. President Reagan announced his diagnosis in a letter to his supporters in 1994.

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